


Back to One

by Ebyru



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Reality, Angst, Denial, Gen, No Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-04-03
Updated: 2012-04-03
Packaged: 2017-11-03 00:11:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/374899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ebyru/pseuds/Ebyru
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Have you ever lost a part of yourself?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Back to One

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by this:
> 
> In those years, people will say, we lost track  
> of the meaning of we, of you,  
> we found ourselves  
> reduced to I

It starts with one. One cocky, bratty, charming kid that breaks girls hearts from a young age. His name is Dean.

 

Then there are two. One still cocky, but softer. The other following him like a shadow, but never trying to be like him—only looking up to him. His name is Sam.

 

Time passes, and it’s two for a long time. Just the two of them. Just Dean leading and Sam following. Until Sam goes away and leaves Dean to lead his own life wherever he pleases, without worrying about the effect on his little brother.

 

Then it’s back to two. Dean leads, Sam follows. But sometimes Sam leads. And Dean likes when Sam does because it means that Dean’s actually done something right in his life; he’s taught his baby brother how to stand on his own two feet.

 

Two becomes three when an angel appears one day. He’s old, but so ignorant of the world outside of Heaven. His name is Castiel.

 

Sam leads Castiel while Dean continues to lead Sam—to lead them _all._ But Castiel isn’t like Sam; he wants to do things his own way.

 

The first to break is Castiel. Sam turns to Dean for help, for an explanation he knows doesn’t exist. Sam did nothing wrong, Castiel chose to stray from their path. They’re back to two.

 

Sam breaks next. Dean’s not sure whether it’s because of the guilt or from trying so hard to do everything right, but he feels responsible all the same.

 

Now it’s just one.

 

One bitter, cynical, unsociable drunk with no brother and no best friend. Girls still run to him, but he turns them away. Sometimes he says his name is _Sam_ , other times he says he’s called _Castiel_.

 

But never is he _Dean_. Never again.

**Author's Note:**

> comments are <3


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